Emotions aren’t good or bad, they just are

The ability for us to be in allowance of a full range of emotional states, both positive and negative, is crucial for the development of our children's self-esteem and happiness.

As parents, we all want our kids to experience joy, happiness, excitement, and peace more frequently than sadness, frustration, fear, or anger. We usually have a lot of judgment about negative emotions and we often make them serious and significant. The emotions we think of as negative often aren’t really negative at all, but active responses to uncomfortableor unexpected situations which, in and of themselves, are every bit as normal and natural as laughter.

We all experience negative emotions and feelings of some kind. Anything, where we believe we have less choice than we actually have, is deemed a negative emotion. Negative feelings and emotions go hand-in-hand and most of us can experience both without damaging effects. When we judge the negative emotion as bad or wrong we make them significant,  we allow them to create limitation.

In truth, emotions aren’t good or bad, they just are. There is nothing either negative or positive about them. So, it is essential to allow our children to simply feel their emotions without judgment. Allow them the freedom to just be.  If we have the judgment that their emotions are positive or negative, we’ll tend to focus on the allegedly positive ones and try to eliminate the allegedly negative ones – and our children won’t develop a full range of emotional or social skills.

Don’t make their emotion significant, don’t blow things out of proportion and most important, don't judge them. Just acknowledge their emotions, be there for them, and give them love and affection. The magic is in allowing them to be with their emotional experience.  If children are allowed to express their emotion when they need to, it allows them the opportunity to express themselves without concern of being judged. In fact, allowing our children to experience a variety of emotions is an enormously beneficial thing , and it is necessary for living a balanced life.

What if we could see each emotion as a beautiful expression of life? What if joy and sadness aren’t opposites, instead they’re partners? So stop labeling them as positive or negative, or good or bad.

Pixar, Inside Out Characters, Closeup © Disney

Pixar, Inside Out Characters, Closeup © Disney

I am very intrigued and delighted by Pixar’s latest animated movie ''Inside Out'. The movie is so brilliant at showing us that our emotions are all important, every single one of them - even Disgust, Fear, and Anger.  is a tale of emotional maturity.''Inside Out'

All negative emotions have something to show us, and when we can get past negative emotions, a positive emotion is right around the corner. Without sadness, there is no joy.

'Inside Out' highlights that we need to openly experience all our emotions, and that the more we recognize and be in allowance of our emotion, the more resilient we will be to cope with life’s unexpected turns and twists.  Overall, ‘Inside Out’ was awesome. I highly recommend it.  The message of this movie reminded me ofthe poem in the book 'The Prophet' written by Kahlil Gibran

Kahlil Gibran writes -  'When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy…… When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.'